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Necessary steps to develop emotional mastery and change your life

By Anastasia Baraeva
3 min read

Going through a rough patch, you might ask, “Why do I have to experience that?” We all want to live in peace with no wars. However, analyzing the facts, you can see that it’s impossible because we live in a polarized world. Happiness goes hand in hand with sadness. Birth is impossible without death. Success usually comes after failure. These are well-known facts, but how we can benefit from this knowledge?

A balanced life involves understanding the world through its opposites. Actually, every failure brings a chance to succeed in something. Every difficulty gives a ticket to a new version of life. When you change your perception, you change your reality.

“How can I change my life?” you ask me. (Yes, I hear you 😊)

We should learn how to work with emotions, whatever they are. Here are some necessary steps.

Acknowledge what you feel

Elizabeth Gilbert, in her book “Big Magic,” teaches us to make space for all emotions. Speaking of fears, before embarking upon a new project or big adventure, she says out loud something like this: “My dear fear, I know you exist to protect me. But listen, now I’m over eighteen to decide what is right for me and what is not. I take full responsibility for who I am and what I feel; now I am ready to face any challenges. ”

selective focus photography of buddha bust decor
Photo by Mark Daynes on Unsplash

Agree on being vulnerable

Vulnerability is scary. However, vulnerability is the birthplace of courage. The more vulnerable you are, the more courageous you can become. Successful people are willing to look foolish in the short-term to win in the long-term. They believe this feeling signifies that a fixed mindset should be changed to a growth mindset. Try to flip thoughts such as “When I struggle with something, it means I am a failure” to “When I struggle with something, it means I am learning.”

Use your right as a human

You have the right to feel what you feel. Everything is OK despite the wide range of uncomfortable emotions you experience. However, because of human nature, your responsibility is to learn from any life lesson; don’t miss its meaning. Think back on what happened and develop your skills to reflect.

Observe your emotions

Practice being an observer of your inner world. Emotions are like colors, and we are painters who use the palette of colors to paint our lives. As pictures are different, why do we insist on using only light colors? Don’t suppress emotions, experience them.

Star in your own life

Fantasies where heroes look for the answers, hints, or keys to their happiness by facing challenges are very popular nowadays. Interestingly, we humans create these heroes, write books about them, and encourage children to read these stories. But how could we have created them if we were not alike? Stop binge-watching TV shows; your life is the greatest movie where the main role is yours. Trust yourself; you’re stronger than you think. I’m sure that you will figure out how to deal with the problems you’re facing right now.

Remember this final thought

Everything has its price. If you want to change your life, think and act differently. No one, unfortunately, will think or make the right decision for you. The price of the new is taking responsibility for who you are and what is happening in your life right now. The decision-making skill is priceless and always pays off.